Land of the fruits and nuts

I think this is my 4th installment in a discursion into proof that a ‘study’ is useless because the obvious needs no research. Autism’s rise is highest in the elitist enclave of California’s land of the fruits and nuts. Duh! Why? No study is necessary to prove the obvious that 1. definitions of autism have been relaxed and expanded of time. 2. Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) now covers a broad swath of children with ‘impaired’ social skills born and bred to elitist, non–conventional, liberal parents who can spend thousands of dollars for evaluations. 3. The epicenter of the autism cluster is in areas around Hollywood. 4. I’m saving the best answer for last. Be patient.

A health journal article covering this phenomena, states that on average, 1 in 110 American 8-year olds had an autism spectrum disorder in 2006 a 57% increase since 2002. In the same article a chart shows that 9 out of every 1,000 8-year olds, were diagnosed with ASD. Well, which is it?
1/110 or 1/1000. In either case, 109 or 999 kids could probably be judged as normal if the parents were ‘normal.’ So 4. the obvious reason we have this phenomena is money. Always follow the money. Children deemed ‘substantially developmentally disabled’ qualify for services from the DDS ( Dept. of Developmental Services). What a wonderful way to obtain free child care while a parent (or 2). either a fruit and a nut or both, pursues a dreamy, self-centered Hollywood lifestyle.

To add insult to abuse, political correctness must be observed even with agenda-driven illnesses. One school district was reprimanded because it has too many white students diagnosed as autistic when compared to other racial subgroups. Amity last year had 38 white autistic students, one Asian and one black. What to do, what to do?

Another study of 6th and 7th graders proves that abstinence programs resulted in only 33% having sex in contrast to programs not about abstinence where the percentage was over 50%. Again the obvious is over-looked. No 6th or 7th graders should be having or considering sex. Without this fact for the major premise, we’re doomed.

Another study suggests that severe mental illness may be prevented with the intervention of fish oil. Yet the study concludes that ‘no one knows what causes schizophrenia.” Of course the results of this study appear in an issue of the Archives of General Psychiatry; we know that all psychiatrists are nuts whose goal is to fool mother nature. Psychiatrists apparently have already tried (and failed on ethical grounds) to administer anti-psychotics to selected young people - to stave off future schizophrenia - with mixed results.

I say forget studies. Study the progress and immutability of nature, read Gerard Manley Hopkins’ poem, God’s Grandeur, sip a cup of flavored tea and try to forget Obama is our President. Good luck.