GIVE ME A 'C'

The C student starts a restaurant; the A student writes the food review. Only a A student, elitist and disconnected from the possibilities and realities of the real world could have thought up recycling. I recycle only because bins are conveniently located near my home. Recycling itself, however, is a utopian delusion. Take this morning’s deposits. #1. A shaded olive oil bottle belongs in the glass bag. An aluminum cap in the aluminum. But how will the plastic liner of the cap will be extricated to be dropped in the plastic bag? Impossible! #2. A cardboard wrapper of a rug and room deodorizer powder will be dropped in the paper bag. The metal bottom, destined for the metal bag, must be cut away with a sturdy and steady knife. The plastic top, destined for the plastic bag, again must be cut away with my knife. The gardenia scented room deodorizer represents another triplet in my recycling project. So Mr. and Ms. smarty pants A student, what do you suggest I do with the plastic-lines aluminum cap that defies logic? Logic being defied each any every time I spend minutes washing cans and bottles and playing with knives? Wouldn’t a huge, efficient, powerful and sanitizing destructo machine that grinds up and spits out a product the result of an unpredictable (but guaranteed) input, be more to the liking of a C student with common sense?