UNCOMMON CENTS 29

THE ANNUAL COMMEMORATION OF THE COMING OF CHRIST AT CHRISTMAS RETURNS. I'M ALSO READY FOR THE SECOND COMING OF CHRIST, CONFIDENT I WILL NOT BE LEFT BEHIND. SINCE 1965, THE PRESENCE OF A CAT BOX IN MY HOME HAS BEEN UNREMITTING; I HAVE DULY DONE MY DUTY CLEANING IT EACH DAY. ALMOST 15,000 DAYS LATER, I STAKE MY ETERNAL FATE ON A JOB WELL DONE. PLUS, FOR THE PAST 15,000 DAYS I HAVE REMAINED DEBT, DELINQUENCY AND PAYMENT FREE EXCEPT FOR THE HOUSE LOAN WHICH WAS EXPUNGED DECADES AGO. DETACHED FROM EARTHLY STRINGS, I STAND SEMPER PARATUS FOR THE END OF DAYS. YOU CAN ALSO BE CONSCIENCE - IF NOT LITTER - FREE. STOP SPENDING WHAT YOU DON'T HAVE; SAVE A LITTLE OF WHAT YOU DO. NO MATTER WHAT SALARY YOU EARN, PAY CASH FOR WHAT YOU WANT AND NEED. THE WANTS, OF COURSE, ARE THE 'KILLERS' WHOSE EXTORTIONS THREATEN TO ELIMINATE YOUR RESOLVE AND SENSE OF SELF-RESPECT. THE TABLET FROM MT. SINAI CALLS THIS UNETHICAL URGE, GREED.

HINT: CHRISTMAS IS THE SEASON OF GIVING, GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK FROM SPENDING. AS GRANNY CAUTIONED, "LOOK BUT DON'T TOUCH."