Sunday, January 01, 2006

MY '51 FORD

MY NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION INVOLVES REGRET. I RESOLVE TO FINALLY PUT THE REGRET OF DISPOSING OF MY '51 FORD BEHIND ME . THEY CAN'T RECREATE A COUPE LIKE MY FIRST, PALE GREEN MACHINE ITS LIGHT PAINT JOB PROMISED MY YOUTHFUL OWNERSHIP A SPRINGTIME OF PLEASURE. IT SPORTED HEAVY CHROME BUMPERS, WIDE WHITEWALL TIRES, A HEAVY METAL FRAME, STICK-SHIFT ON THE STEERING WHEEL, FABRIC SEATS, A STATE OF THE ART RADIO WITH 2 DIALS AND OPTIONAL OVERDRIVE. THAT OVERDRIVE INSPIRED ME TO GET "GUTS" AND TAKE IT TO 80 MPH ON THE OPEN EXPRESSWAY. AT THAT SPEED I WAS AIRLIFTED ALONG, QUIET AND SILENT AS A MOTORIZED PEGASUS, GLIDING WITH APPARENT WEIGHTLESSNESS ABOVE THE PAVED LANES. AT NIGHT MY FORD GUIDED ME WITH ROUND, BRIGHT EYES. I THINK I LOVED MY '51 FORD, OR , AT MOST, I HELD IT DEAR. MECHANICALLY IT NEVER FAILED, NEVER LET ME DOWN EVEN IN THE BLIZZARD OF THE '60'S. WHY THEN DID I PUT IT DOWN AFTER A MINOR FRONT-END BUMPER CRUMPLER? DISPOSAL OF IT WAS AKIN TO CONSIGNING A MAIMED ANIMAL TO THE SLAUGHTERHOUSE. IF YOU WERE EVER IRRATIONALLY EXUBERANT, PERHAPS YOU CAN FATHOM MY REASONING BACK THEN. I CAN'T. I INHERITED MY USED '51 FORD FROM MY PARENTS. THEIR PRECEDING CAR WAS A 30'S COUPE IN WHICH I SAW BITS OF THE " U.S.A." IN OUR "CHEVROLET." AS MY HUSBAND GUIDED HIS GREY '64 CHEVY THROUGH OUR NEWLYWED YEARS, I DROVE MY '51 FORD UNTIL THE ACCIDENT. THAT BEGAT A SUCCESSION OF VEHICLES. ALL POSSESSED MUSCLES THAT I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND AND APPOINTMENTS, INTERIOR AND EXTERIOR, I IGNORED. "TAKE YOU THERE AND GET YOU BACK," WAS HALF OF MY HUSBAND'S PHILOSOPHY OF CARS. THE OTHER HALF WAS HIS BELIEF IN CASH UP FRONT. WITH BOTH HALVES I CONCURRED. WHAT FOLLOWED FOR ME WAS A VINTAGE ROYAL BLUE '48 CHEVY WITH MAG WHEELS. NEXT I PURCHASED A NEW, RED FORD FALCON AND MY SPOUSE BOUGHT A BURGUNDY MERCEDES BECAUSE OUR JOBS PAID WELL. EVENTUALLY, USED WORKHORSES ACCOMPANIED MARRIED LIFE WITH CHILDREN. THE ORANGE FORD SUBURBAN, BEATUP FORD STATION WAGON, BLUE VOLKSWAGON BEETLE AND BROWN '77 PLYMOUTH VOLARE WAGON CARRIED OUR FAMILY THROUGH TOUGH (BUT EXCITING) YEARS. WE SPLURGED ON A USED SILVER JAGUAR AND NEW BLUE FORD VAN WHEN A BUSINESS VENTURE BOOMED. WE PURCHASED PICKUP TRUCKS. LIKE DRAFT HORSES THEY MADE ME FEEL TALL, SAFE AND IMPORTANT CHUGGING DOWN COUNTY ROADS. OUR '65 "BIG RED" WORK TRUCK FAINTLY REMINDED ME OF MY '51 FORD. IT PERFORMED FAITHFULLY UP TO 25 YEARS OF AGE UNTIL ITS BROKEN FRAME CONSIGNED IT TO THE AUCTION LOT. THREE FORD PICKUPS , TWO USED, TAN AND BLUE, AND ONE, NEW, A BURGUNDY, ALL WITH KING CABS CARRIED ON. WE PREFERRED FORDS FOR OUR TRANSPORTATION BECAUSE THEY WEATHERED ABUSE. ALL MAKES WERE GAS-GUZZLERS. THE CHECK LIST OF CAR PROBLEMS, SOLVED AND UNSOLVABLE WAS LONG: A VAPOR LOCK, A BROKEN DRIVE SHAFT, OIL LEAKS, A CATALYTIC CONVERTER FIRE, STALLING IN WET WEATHER, REPEATED FLAT TIRES AND BLOWN TRANSMISSIONS. THE JAG WAS A CONVICT, HAVING BEEN PREVIOUSLY STOLEN. THE BENZ WAS A LEMON SUCKING MONEY DOWN AN UNREPAIRABLE DRAIN. NO VEHICLE WAS TRADED IN; IT WAS JUST SOLD-OFF OR JUNKED. OTHER SUNDRY CARS AND TRUCKS, THAT BELONGED TO OUR OFFSPRING, SOME WITH CHROME WHEELS, BOOMING WATTS OF BASE, LIFT BEDS OR OUTRAGEOUS STRIPES, CAME AND WENT. THESE ACQUISITIONS WERE TITLED, TOTALED, BOUGHT AND SOLD OVER TIME. ONE, TRAGICALLY, WAS DESTROYED BY A DRUNK DRIVER BEHIND THE WHEEL OF HIS LETHAL WEAPON. IS OVERPRICED PLASTIC WORTH THE INVESTMENT FOR SAFETY TODAY WHEN QUALITY AND SOLIDITY OF MATERIALS ARE GONE AND STYLES HAVE CHANGED? AT MY LAST CAR SHOW, EONS AGO, SEXY WOMEN AND SHINY 4-WHEELED STEEDS WITH MANLY ALLURE WHIRLED ABOUT ON PLATFORMS. THOSE WERE THE GOLDEN DAYS WHEN MY '51 FORD WAS TOP STALLION.

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