As if I've lost a child

My grief is so profound it is as if I lost a child. I wonder where he is; wonder if someone has loved him as I  have through adoption. I see him in everything around my home; I never want to forget his passing through, his angelic visit, his perfection of form and function in the being of a cat. Nevertheless, how can I find a way forward?  I miss him so badly the light he put into my drab, meaningless life has gone out. I worry where he is (he was in perfect protection here). I know no angel of God can be hurt with evil because he is pure goodness, but... how can I let go? 4 days seems to you a short time. However,  my unmitigated sobbing seems endless in its suffering. Stormy I can't believe I learned to love you in only 3 short months. God only knows!