GOBBLEDYGOOK

GOBBLEDYGOOK WAS INVENTED SOMEWHERE AROUND THE YEAR OF MY BIRTH, BUT I HAD NO IDEA IT WOULD TAKE THIS LONG TO FIND THE PERFECT ILLUSTRATION FOR USING FANCIFUL WORDS TO EMBELLISH NOTHINGNESS AND THE IMPLEMENTATION OF THEM INTO EDUCATIONAL PRACTICES. GOBBLEDYGOOK IS PROOF POSITIVE THAT AMERICA, VIA ITS GOVERNMENT AND POLITICIANS, HAS MONEY TO BURN. NO TALK SHOULD EVER BE ENTERTAINED AGAIN OF LACK OF FUNDING, OF A MONEY CRUNCH OR OF POVERTY IN ANY OF ITS WAYS, SHAPES OR FORMS.

A NEW PROGRAM, APPARENTLY FUNDED BY 'NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND,' WAS STARTED THIS FALL FOR K-2ND GRADE, CUSTOM DESIGNED FOR CHILDREN WITH BORDERLINE AUTISM AND "LOW INCENTIVE DISABILITIES." FORGET THE FACT THAT I QUESTION THAT BORDERLINE AUTISM AND "LOW INCENTIVE DISABILITIES" EXIST; IT IS DIFFICULT TO QUOTE FROM THE DIRECTOR OF THIS INITIATIVE FOR THE EDUCATION OF CHILDREN AFFLICTED WITH THESE CONDITIONS WITHOUT INVOKING GOD. OH GOD, FORGIVE ME FOR THE NEED TO INVOKE YOUR NAME AGAIN AND AGAIN! WHAT ELSE CAN A COMMON SENSE PERSON DO CONFRONTED WITH MEANINGLESS JARGON SUPPORTING A MEANINGLESS WASTE OF MONEY, SUPPORTING MEANINGLESSNESS ITSELF IN A EDUCATIONAL SETTING.

BASICALLY, DIRIGESTE, GOVERNMENT INTERFERENCE IN PARENTS' LIVES, HAS RUN AMOK. PARENTS DEMAND THAT SOME ENTITY OTHER THAN THEMSELVES ENTERTAIN AND "TEACH" THEIR CHILDREN. GOVERNMENT GIVES THEM WHAT THEY WANT EVEN IF UNSUSPECTING TAXPAYERS FOOT THE BILL. FROM TEACHER, I HEARD ABOUT:

"SEEING DATA,
A FUNCTIONAL TYPE OF SKILLS,
HOW WE ARE ONE TRAIN,
RESEARCH-BASED BLUE WALLS,
HOW THEY ONLY LEARN IF ACCOMMODATED,
PICTURE PREDICTABILITY,
DAY BY DAY BASIS CHANGING,
A LAVENDER-VANILLA SCENTED ROOM,
HIGHLIGHTED CHARACTER TRAITS,
HEART TO MINDS,
PEER ASSISTED LEARNING,
A MULTI-SENSORY CLASSROOM,
MANY MODALITIES,
EATING LETTERS AND
AROMA THERAPY.

OH, GOD, MY GOD, BE AWARE THAT A COMPETING GOD, ‘EDUCARE’, I SPENDING A SURFEIT OF MONEY ON GOBBLEDYGOOK. HIS ROYAL PROGRAM IS THE BASTARD CHILD OF GENUINE EDUCATION AND ADEQUATE CHILD CARE MASQUERADING AS A GLORIFIED, POLITICALLY CORRECT BABY SITTER. UNFORTUNATELY, THIS DIVINE KING, ‘EDUCARE’ WON’T BE ABDICATING HIS THRONE ANY TIME SOON WHEN AMERICA HAS SO MUCH MONEY TO BURN.